In her Personality Matters series, Leslie Sachs examines the personalities and people-issues that are found in technology groups from cross-functional, high-performance teams to dysfunctional matrix organizations.
One of the most difficult personality types to deal with is the person who always seems mistrustful of others. Sometimes, this lack of trust is justified, but sometimes it is really a manifestation of some dysfunctional personality issue. This article will help you understand this situation and suggest a few ways you can deal with difficult personality types like the paranoid person.
One of the most difficult personality types to deal with is the person who always seems distrustful of others. Sometimes, this lack of trust is well-justified and sometimes it is really a manifestation of some dysfunctional personality issue. You probably won’t find too many severe cases in your workplace where the person is actually so paranoid that they are dissociated from reality. Psychologists sometimes diagnose this mental illness as paranoid schizophrenia, which may require medications and intensive therapy to manage. What is far more common is the person with a borderline personality who manages to operate within a normal workplace environment, but always seems to be a little “off.” Eccentric behavior is not in and of itself a reason to suspect that someone suffers from mental illness, but sometimes the behavior and personality of a coworker may be so extreme that it impacts other people’s ability to work. This article will help you understand this situation and suggest a few ways in which you can deal with difficult personality types like the paranoid person.
Harry Stack Sullivan was an American psychiatrist who noted that paranoia may be associated with suspicion, a tendency to blame others, and also a sense that one is being persecuted.  Remember, you are not alone if you have a coworker who exhibits some or all of these dysfunctional behaviors. Some folks just have a disposition in which they are always expecting the worst from others. Quite often, this tendency may actually result in a self-fulfilling prophecy in which a person’s behavior elicits responses from others that actually reinforce his view that someone is always out to “get” them.
As Dr. Sullivan noted, it is common for the person to then resort to blaming others in an attempt to protect himself in what may seem like a silly turf war. Unfortunately, many of these folks take these incidents very seriously and may truly feel that they are being persecuted. These defense mechanisms may be quite destructive to not only the person himself, but to everyone around him, too.
People who have trust issues often find it difficult to collaborate and cooperate with others. This can make it very tough in a technology organization in which everyone has to rely upon each other for specialized expertise. Sometimes, people with difficult personalities actually focus on being experts in a specific technology area that enables them to feel safe because they have complete control and power due to their specialized knowledge and often extensive knowledge of institutional history. But consider for a moment that sometimes a little suspiciousness can actually be justifiable and perhaps partially a consequence of the situation.
There are some organizations that just do not foster trust and collaboration. Employees who work in dysfunctional organizations may understandably exhibit dysfunctional behavior. If you are the new guy on the block, you may not know all of the organizational history and, consequently, may not fully understand why some employees seem unusually distrustful or have developed other defense mechanisms to defend their turf.
One example is the organization that attempts to “motivate” its employees through a constant threat of layoffs or other forms of termination. Creating a state of fear does not result in productive, effective, and loyal employees. Some managers use their positional power to try to control and motivate others through fear and intimidation. While respect for authority is important, there are much more effective ways to motivate employees than just fear, including the fear of losing one’s job and livelihood.
The middle ground often involves understanding the person within the context or situation that he must work in. If you were working in an army during a time of war, you may react very differently than if you were working in an Internet startup company.
So, here are some thoughts on how to navigate these difficult situations. First and foremost, effective communication is essential. If you find yourself dealing with a person who seems unreasonably distrustful, try to be clear about what you need and also listen carefully to what his view involves—that’s a good starting point. Conflicts in the workplace are often the result of a misunderstanding or even some institutional history that occurred long before you even joined the organization. You should consider who else can help you navigate these waters.